This scene is seriously the cutest thing ever.
#Remember when there was a non-human person who hadnt talked to anyone of her species in decades #And her only companion was the man she loved and who ignored her or bossed her around and was rude to her #And Martha met her and the Doctor and Jack were busy doing ‘important shit’ #But Martha was the one who took the time to chat with her #To learn more about her language and culture #Who befriended her #Encouraged her to open up and joked with her and made her laugh #And then because of that discovered what they needed to know BEFORE EVERYONE ELSE#remember that #Remember that time Martha Jones was better than you #God bless Martha Jones
my favourite thing about history is how everyone tries to invade russia but are somehow caught off guard by the russian winter
Winter is coming, idiotski
something i’ve always wondered about asoiaf: the starks are all “we’re wolves!” and the greyjoys are “we’re krakens!” and the lannisters refer to themselves as lions alarmingly frequently and then you have dany who i’m 98% sure believes she is a winged, fire-breaking dragon
but what about some of these other houses right like what about house redwyne are they like “aw yeah we’re grapes” or house selmy “we’re fuckin’ wheat y’all, watch the fuck out” like
The most dangerous phrase in the language is, “we’ve always done it this way.”
"Come on, let’s mix it up!" The heart surgeon says.
"B-but we’ve always done it this way!" The other replies, "this is how you replace a heart valve."
"That’s the most dangerous phrase in the human language!" The first surgeon replies haughtily as he inputs a fruit loop into the patient’s heart. "This will be his valve. He will be a fruit loop in a world of Cheerios."
(taken from this post on the experiments of Harry Harlow)
This is serious business, because this is a large part of how sexism, racism, homophobia, rape culture, ethnocentrism, etc. continue to happen.
"Oh. I was hoping for a philosophical debate"
#Is an entire species brainwashed to be mindless genocidal murderers#if they don’t know they’ve been subliminally programmed to commit genocide on sight#by subliminal messages left in the recording of the moon landing?#Is a Time War-ending genocide still a genocide#if it’s only against the Daleks?#Oh wait that’s right we stopped asking those sorts of questions a few years ago didn’t we (via gallifreyburning)
why are people always so pissy about the fact that taylor swift writes the majority of her songs about love and relationships like she’s a 23 year old white girl from pennsylvania what do you want her to write about the thug life
Have you ever been to earth?
On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain:
You’re an idiot.
Let me further explain:
Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern.
Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.
When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito.
And guess what else, player? You probably can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what:
Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND.
My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET.
You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers.
And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THAT’S HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT’S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE.
What’s that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DON’T WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON’T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN.
I just want a burrito.
You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys.
UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID “JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK”:
A fucking fork?
I DIDN’T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD.
If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER.
That’s like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL.
Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They’re called fucking HANDS.
A fork. My god. I haven’t cried since I was six, but I’m fucking sobbing now.
People eat burritos with forks?
God is sorry he made us.
I always need this on my blog.
I can’t be laughing this hard in the morning.
One of my favourite shows:
One of my least favourite shows:
Do you see my problem
"You know nothing, tumblr user enterprising-gentleman."
Based on this original post from a while back; I wanted to do a full version for the new season.
So how’d I do?
My shower has two temperatures; winter is coming and fire cannot kill a dragon
Let’s just talk about Wednesday’s perfect “not giving a fuck” attitude because it’s marvelous.